Thursday, April 28, 2011

Birther Blather

I’m disappointed . . . along with a bunch of other people. The President has released his birth certificate . . . again. He wants to make the issue go away. What issue is that, you ask? Oh, the fake issue of his birth status—he’s not American, remember?? So, anyway, the Prez is trying to make the Birthers shut up. But, how is he doing it?? By releasing facts!!
Hahahahahahaha. The Prez thinks the issue lacks facts. Hahahahahahahahaha.
Prez, the Birthers don’t employ facts. They make stuff up, remember?? Like the Faux News Network, whose motto is, “We make stuff up, so you don’t have to.” Rupert never let a fact get in his way.
The Birthers are (take your pick) terminally stupid, charlatans, racists, terminally crazy, all of the above. But Mr. Prez, if you actually stopped them from debating your non-existent Kenyan birth, they would have to dream up something else to debate.  And someday they may stumble across real issues, like the national debt, deficits, George’s wars, your war,  global warming, health care, the failure of free-market economics, unemployment ..  . you know, real problems. And we do not want these people anywhere near real problems.  We need them to remain fixated on your birthplace, The Donald’s hairpiece, Sarah bimbo’s kids, and Mike Dingleberry’s belief that the earth is really flat and at the center of the universe.  So long as they are debating that crap, they won’t be able to damage actual thinking/debating of reality.
So quit trying to bring them into our universe, Mr. Prez. I’m sure that the aliens in their alternate universe really like them.
And that’s a good thing.
And on yet another exoplanet, the Bank of America has announced that it has contracted with the Italian Mafia in Sicily. The full terms of the contract have not yet been released, but we are told that Mafia hit-men will break your kneecaps if you fail to pay your credit card bills on time.

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