Being 91

 OK, So I’m still 91 and kick’n. But why? Why am I still “kick’n”? I know, I know, I am not supposed to ask such questions. But still, with more frequency, I keep wondering, Why Am I Here?

But then, why are any of us still here? Life seems endlessly filled with tales of horror, mixed in with all that great fun, and those wonderful cocktails and dinners with loved ones.  

But my Aware life began when I was about 6, sitting in our front room on the floor, listening to the radio by myself. Oh and it happened to be around that December 7^th thing –you know, 1941, and some dude named Roosevelt was yakking to us about bombs and things being thrown at us in some far off place called Pearl Harbor.   Before that, all I had heard was Jack Benny and dudes like him trying to entertain us 6-year olds.  But that event seemed to spark humans all over the world. That War thing continued with lots of folks being killed all around our sorry-assed globe. But, that War also seemed to  (for little me) spell the beginning of Humanity’s Kill-Me Psyche. From then on, humans seemed to get off on the killing machines.  WW II, Korea, Vietnam, various Middle Eastern kills, the killing never really stopped, although it periodically slowed down.  Now we have The Russkies killing Ukrainians, Trump killing Iranians, Bibi killing whoever crosses his path in Israeli territories, annoyed Frenchmen screaming at their government, Sudanese blowing things up. And on and on.

And we are supposed to believe that Humans were invented by a peaceful and loving God(dess?). The unending killing machines being operated non-stop by Humans makes me wonder why anyone would believe that we are here for some loving and kindly purpose. We are supposed to worship and love this God that invented all of us killing machines?  Humans are killing little children, practically as we speak. Why?  Are Humans really this flawed and uncaring? Or are Humans simply uncaring, killing machines who believe it’s ok to gun down your neighbor, or your neighbors’ kids in some school.

Honestly, at this tender age of 91, I no longer understand what to believe.  I know, I know, I have loving relatives , kids, grands, even great grands who never even think of killing anyone. And my still weekly Thursday datenites at Steve’s lovely Brewery still provides me with the caring attention of our friends, and the caring staff at the Brewery. My good friends who appear every Thursday help to make my life a continued joy.   And seeing kids and grands laughing and giving me hugs still fills me with joy.

It is all a lot more difficult without the love of my life – my beloved Carol (71 years together) sharing the daily joys. But the joys remain.  I just wish we could get rid of all the killing machines, and play chess with one another instead of trying to shoot each other.

Yeah, as my long life begins to close out, I may not know how folks will dwell on it.  But, folks, please try and figure out some way to keep the laughs, the smiles from kids, the Cheers when we toast one another with a beer or glass of wine.  Maybe we should throw away our TVs and focus on one another nearby. Be nice to your neighbor. Don’t frown on that poor dude sitting by the side of the street cuz he has no home. Maybe give him something to help him live another day.

And the Trumpies??? Well, we need to get rid of them in a civilized manner. Yeah, don’t shoot them. Instead, vote them out big time.  It’s up to us to try to bring back civilized behavior folks. It is technically possible to be civil to one another, even if we disagree with one another.  Be nice to one another, even if it seems difficult. You don’t have to love everyone. But be civil to one another. Try. Otherwise, that AI thingie really will rid the Earth of everyone. And we do not want that. So cheers, folks, Have a nice glass of beer, or a fine wine, and smile.